mad drunk genius

I used to have all sorts of problems. Now there's just the one.

Tag: music

I am a fool who knows better & chooses worse

April 11, 2017
——I sat here last year, also with the sun in my eyes.
What good, what hope, is there that this cycle will exceed the
prior ones?
——Waking not-hungover (tho deserved) on a couch as like
——from a nap to hear the splash of stomach purging
——into a toilet walls-away & wondering, ‘Is my
——housemate sick from some microbial invader or
——last nite’s microbrew invited excessive in?’ The
——answer of sickness put-upon or self-made soon
——arrives as he leaves his room to go to work usual.
——You must live with yr misery when you’ve earned it. 

The older I get, the more sensitive I get to my creepiness.
I always was, but I’m more aware now than then & suspect
people will be less forgiving of my flab, wrinkles,
& gray hairs.
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Everything terrible thing that happened once can happen again, & worse

——It aint been a year in this margin quite but nearly & may as well.
I’ll switch to a narrower pen in just a line.
——I never know what I want except that it’s always the other thing.
There’s a woman at this bar, lead singer of a damn good band, and she
asked for my number twice, texted at me twice, then ignored me. I dont
fuckin know what she after, but I’m too tired to put any work in to figurin
it out. Maybe that’s what she’s after & if so, good call by her.
——The band playing just now is good enough, but he cant really play
——Roger Miller worth a damn
‘The lead singer has laryngitis.’ Aint that just the way.

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A smartphone is a fine excuse to avoid self-interrogation

July 2, 2016
——I dont know what my word cloud would show.
Some things known cant be unknown.
——’Birth control is a women’s issue’ is not trans-inclusive.
‘Civil, right?’
——It’s stupid to continue to invest in past relationships
——just because they are safely impossible.
I want to leave her, but not for that.
——It may have been my fault anyway. But honesty never was
——something to benefit anything but my own vanity.
How else could we have done it?
——Whatever. I am what I am.
Tell the story of yourself with actions, not words.
——The depths of my compassion is visible from the surface.
A collection of accidents, connecting the dots. A life, a narrative.
——‘The truth is not a luxury.’
History forgets all; most it never remembers.

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There is no end to the last days

Bacon from the back. Bounty for the good bonus. A boudoir, to have a place to pout.

Fear nothing, dreadnought. Nautical noisy nausea. Leave work to go debauch. But if god deems it doomsday, we’ll all be judged.

Doctors are learned people who teach. Old Saxon dipping was dopian, baptizing, then the doop any viscous sauce before one in particular. So some are baptized by water, others by fire, but the dope is the baptism itself, and not everyone comes back up for air.  That’s why the dope fiend droops, and addiction is its own religion.

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Not all scars fade except to turn to dust

I’m bothered by my shortcomings b/c I didnt used to be
able to see them & still cant see the shortcomings of others well.
——Jesus was wrong. The heart & eye cant sin as limbs do.
Not all stepped-in dog shit clings to yr boot.
——It’s important to remember your pain doesnt hurt anyone else.
Regret is just noticing you’ve traveled downstream.
——I can see the antenna from my house.
Most people just go where the tailwinds push.
Head winds should be trivial, but they’re explanatory.
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It doesnt have to be genius to be good or appreciable

Generosity is always most generous to yr ego.
——’For those of you wondering what to do,
——just do it.’
‘Sing it & sing it, and that’s how we do it.’
——I’m part of the problem, of course!
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Love has many homonyms

——I dont know anyone but myself
——& the images I make of others.
All images are hallucinations & all love self-love.
——Sex is masturbation with yrself.
I keep expecting to see her car disappeared.
But then I never expected she’d come.
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Everything above is gray; what’s below is green.

Everything is a fine scurrying about between permanent stillness.

It’s not the pretty day got me out the house, but the event.
This truly is a holy day.

Soon all the quaint homes with moss-green roofs will be gone.
But the moss only for a little while.

Language is meant to coordinate our solar batteries into some
action preserving us & our offspring. Read the rest of this entry »

Alcoholism is a meritocracy.

The night give up the morning when the birds say.
Dawn is a formality only.
——Non-human persons make sense to me.
——Human non-persons, too.
——An acorn is an oak but not a tree.
——A dolphin neednt thumbs for empathy.
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My memory is a lash

——’I can still feel my face so
——I’ll take another double.’
It’s plenty to see green things
curl & unfurl in fractal ecstasy
——My beer hand wasnt as cold as
——my cigarette hand, somehow.
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